Being a Billionaire Is No Stroll in the Park

J.P. Morgan Private Bank interviewed 111 of them.

John Pierport Morgan, the founder of what became JPMorgan Chase & Co.
Source: Images of American Political History, public domain.

If you ever thought, “If I had a billion dollars, all my problems would be solved,” you haven’t watched “Succession.” And you haven’t read “Principal Discussions: Conversations with the World’s Wealthiest Families,” a new report by J.P. Morgan Private Bank, a unit of JPMorgan Chase & Co., based on interviews last year with 111 billionaires.

The report promises “a rare, inside look into the lives and mindsets of the world’s most influential families, revealing that enduring success is built on far more than financial capital.”

I quibble with the assertion that rich equals influential. Mahatma Gandhi, for one, was influential without being rich. It’s easy to think of others.

That said, it’s fascinating to read how billionaires see themselves, as opposed to how they’re fawned upon or vilified by others.

They come across as surprisingly … normal. Their top three “hobbies or interests” were outdoors/nature, work, and time with family and friends. The fact that many ranked work as a top interest is if anything a positive for me: these are not the idle rich of one’s imagination.

The top three habits to which they attributed their success are reading (!), exercise and consistency. Those are good habits. I have a little issue with this one, though, because it subtly implies that if you read, exercise and stay consistent, you, too, can be a billionaire. Which of course is not the case.

When asked, “What keeps you up at night?” many mentioned children and/or aging parents. Relatable.

The billionaires were all over the place on how much and when to tell children about their wealth and what will become of it. “My son has had friends show them my Forbes profile, so they likely know the numbers,” one said.

Succession, in real life as in the TV show, is a sensitive issue for many. “Talking about it with family is one thing but actually putting it in motion is another.” One fretted that “the divorce rates in my town are 70 percent.”

When there are business stresses, one wisely said, “The goal is not to win an argument, but to preserve the relationship.”

There are a little more than 3,000 billionaires in the world, according to Forbes magazine. To most us, they seem to occupy the very pinnacle of success. From their own perspective, though, maybe not.

J.P. Morgan Private Bank said that the collective wealth of the 111 billionaires it interviewed was something above $500 billion, which averages out to less than $5 billion apiece. Given that there were probably some whales in there, one can assume that a lot of the people interviewed weren’t worth much above $1 billion.

Let’s face it, a single billion is chump change to the headliner plutocrats. According to the Bloomberg Billionaires Index, as of Jan. 11 Elon Musk was worth $639 billion. In an average day, Musk’s wealth fluctuates by more than these pikers are even worth.

That may not make you feel sorry for them, but it could explain the surprising nervousness about wealth that many of them expressed.

“Will I be the one that screws it up?” one fifth-generation billionaire asked. Another who went through a scandal said that the experience “answered the question of ‘What does it look like when a wealthy family loses all of it in one day?’”

One aspect of billionaire-hood that most of us cannot relate to is the importance of seeing deal flow, namely, exposure to profit-making opportunities.

“I expect a certain degree of upcoming deal flow,” one told the private bank interviewer. “The last deal was from our daughter’s network,” a second said. “We source deal flow from funds and banks, but the real deal flow comes from my network, before things are on the market,” said a third. The fear of missing out is palpable.

Now, do you still think getting a billion dollars would solve all your problems?